Joose Deathmatch

4 Feb



I’m sure the last time you walked into a gas station you thought “Gee, what is up with these new 90’s tattoo looking Four Loko ripoffs? I mean, how is any self respecting hobo supposed to choose from all four choices? Who can solve this conundrum?!” That’s where I come in, your black night in a vagabond shopping cart. I bought all four flavors at my local gas station and tried them just for you!

Pretty self explanatory, I tried each one and rated it. I also included bonus ratings from a secondary source who is also an idiot.

Peach Margarita – Margarita? No. Peach? Yes. The peach is strong with this, which is yummy but very sweet and one note. Might be good mixed with tea.

Hurricane – Ew. Like watered down gummy bears. Offensively unflavorful.

Spicy Mango Margarita – Fruity but not as overwhelming or sweet as Peach. Very slight spicy kick at the end. Has a bit of complexity to drink a whole can easily.

Screwdriver – More citrusy than orangey, but well balance. Bit of tartness from the citrus which helps make is interesting.

My personal ranking is Spicy Mango, Screwdriver, Peach, then Hurricane.

My room mate preferred Peach, Screwdriver, Hurricane, then Spicy Mango. He thought the Peach’s flavor was good enough to make it drinkable but wasn’t a fan of the Spicy Mango so it may be a love it or hate it type deal.

So, go out and try these. As long as you don’t try the Hurricane.

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Crown Royal Regal Apple

26 Nov


This post stared as most of my posts do, all thanks to the grumpy ABC lady. She often probes my weakness for booze by offering whatever new mini bottles they have at the moment. I realistically did not hold great hope for an apple flavored whiskey.

It turns out my fears were unfounded. The initial hit of slightly sour apple flavoring really mingles well with the whiskey finish. The caramel and vanilla notes really play well with the apple and while the apple is very overwhelming and artificial it somehow works if you like that sort of apple flavor. I can’t help thinking this would work really well with a cinnamon chaser or mixed into apple cider? Either way it is perfect for this season and I rate it a decided CHUG!

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Brixx Bloody Mary

25 Nov

Britts Bloody Mary

As you may know from my previous posts, I am a sucker for a good bloody mary. After my recent trip to Ruby Tuesday I decided to stop into Brixx and check out their Bloody Mary Sunday special that I found on I am a pretty big fan of Brixx because of their superior rotating beer selection for the Mayfaire area and their surprisingly delicious pizza.

The first thing I did upon arriving was ask what bloody mary mix they use. While it wasn’t Whiskey Willys, it wasn’t the crap you normally find at the grocery store. I ordered what I thought was one drink but still received two. You can’t question miracles, just accept them gratefully. The mix was fucking fantastic. Not as good as my holy grail but probably next on the list. It goes by the name A Taste of Florida, and though I haven’t seen it before I suggest giving it a try if you ever find it.

I chose the spicy version and it was tomatolicious without being too thick and had a nice balance of subtle back heat. The drink was garnished with a lime and an olive which I found completely unnecesary but I guess not everyone has celery or shrimp to spare.

Pretty great pick for a bloody mary if you are ever in the area on a Sunday and combined with the decent food it’s all a GO!

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Ruby Tuesday Pretzel Burger

23 Nov

I recently got an email from Ruby Tuesday¬†offering a free burger and since I’m a cheap hobo I absolutely took them up on that offer. Sure their 20oz Sam Adams got me so warm and fuzzy that I called out of work, but that’s neither here nor there. So here I was, ordering food before noon on a Sunday and counting the minutes until booze-o-clock.

I was forced into ordering the Thai Phoon Shrimp (stop reading it as Poon, brain) since I love this app at both Yosake and Okami. And hated it at Bonefish Grill. After a glass of water the shrimp arrived and looked pretty decent.

RT Thai Phoon Shrimp

Unfortunately, looks aren’t everything. The shrimp were tiny and slightly over cooked, the breading was too think and too salty, and the sauce wasn’t flavorful enough to save them. I would venture to say that with a less salty coating they would have been better because the sweetness of the sauce wouldn’t have been obscured. They were edible and I unknowingly finished about half the order via mindless munching long after I thought I was done.

I’d like to take a moment to mention the service at the bar where we sat was pretty close to perfect. He was there without asking, kept our drinks filled, and was completely unobtrusive. I hate when I go to an establishment with the intention of connecting to the person I came with and the server keeps inserting themselves with awkward conversation in an attempt to get a better tip. Do you know how you get a great tip for me? Keep my drink filled and be ready with the check when I need it.

RT Pretzel Burger

Once the pretzel burger came out it was noon and booze was flowing. They did not have my go-to Yuengling on tap so I opted for the Sam Adams. I haven’t had it in a while and it was a bit hoppier than I remember but obviously a better choice than _____-Lite so I dealt. The pretzel burger itself was interesting. It wasn’t the “medium” that I requested but it was still moist and juicy. The fried jalapenos were coated in chili powder which I liked on the burger but was a bit much on it’s own. My favorite part was probably the burger bun. It managed to be slightly sweet and yeasty which I think is an underused profile in the burger bun pantheon. Something within the burger was too salty, it may have been the outside seasoning of the burger but I’m not 100%.

All in all, I would love the try the pretzel burger again with different toppings. The shrimp app I tried was disappointing but I feel some sort of promise from this place and their attempts to snazz up the menu. I will rate it a GO for effort and outstanding bar tending, but with reservations. PUN!

Ruby Tuesday on Urbanspoon


17 May

I basically got hired at my dream job (for now) and have been super caught up with it. I went to Fish Bites as requested by a reader, and will be putting that review up soon. For now if anyone misses me (doubtful) check out my review of Slice of Life at Independence Mall on my friend Pete’s site

Papa Johns Double Cheeseburger Pizza

17 May


I have to admit, the thought of pickles on pizza intrigued me. Without the pickles I never would’ve been as obsessed with trying this pizza. But it did have pickles so here we are. I even paid almost full price (only 20% off) which annoyed me because Papa Johns is always 50% off. The things I do for pickles.

The “burger” sauce was a lot less overwhelming than I expected it to be. It was well portioned and really worked with the sweet crust Papa Johns uses. The tomatoes were decent and the beef was good… when you could find it. For a pizza called Double Cheeseburger, I would expect to see a lot more meat. They should have called it the double pickle pizza, because holy fuck were there a lot of those. I didn’t take issue with the amount, so much as the overwhelmingness of them. The pickles were thin and floppy. When I tried to bite through one, I more often than not ended up dragging half of the cheese and accompanying toppings with it. They worked, but damn there should have been a better way to put them on there.

All in all, it was worth trying once, and I could see myself ordering it again.

Papa John's Pizza on Urbanspoon

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